I HATE MYSELF!"!!

Post by **BlueChair** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 9:28 am

1. I can never get my hair to look right, with it ending up looking like a mop top most of the time, and yet always wait way too long between haircuts.

2. I call myself an editor-in-chief despite having reservations about my abilities as a writer, not to mention the massive holes in musical and filmic knowledge.

3. I say I do not eat beef, and yet I order a pastrami sandwich at Second Avenue Deli in NYC.

4. I used to be a night owl, but now I have difficulty staying up past midnight.. even on weekend!

5. I don't know how to tie a tie

6. I pay a monthly fee for a gym that I haven't been to since the winter

6. Red is a much better driver than me

RedShoes · Post by **RedShoes** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 10:17 am

Ditto Blue's # 1, 4, 5, and the first 6 (the payment actually goes onto my card

)

Add on:

1. I don't shave my legs more than once a week these days. (Sorry, Blue)

2. I have a horrible memory for names - including musicians and other celebrities. Yet I'm the main media relations contact for a music & film magazine.

3.I seem to have forgotten how to write since I graduated university.

4. I have owned (and listened to) albums by Creed, Matchbox 20, and Mariah Carey. And they weren't gifts.

5. No matter how much planning ahead I try to do, I always end up behind when prepping a new issue for Being There - leaving me sleep deprived, stressed, and quite bitchy.

6. I find it impossible to cook dinner without making the kitchen look like a hurricane went through it.

7. I'm far more insecure than I tend to let on.

Who Shot Sam? · Post by **Who Shot Sam?** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 10:53 am

God, where to start?

1. I have absolutely no motivation when it comes to exercise - I keep promising my doc I'll do something about it but never do.

2. I'm a compulsive shopper, especially for music and tech toys and always have to have the "shiny new thing". I also don't bother to comparison shop - if I want something I buy it.

3. I am in serious need of manscaping but really couldn't care less.

4. I unfairly give my five year old daughter greater leeway than my three year old son. I know it's wrong and am working on this one.

5. I defer all financial matters to my wife 'cause I'm just too damn lazy to do it myself.

6. I monopolize the radio/CD player on long car trips.

7. I eat too quickly.

8. I drink too much, but I rationalize it by saying that I rarely drink hard liquor.

9. I don't call my mother in Seattle nearly often enough.

10. I snore.

bobster · Post by **bobster** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 11:37 am

In some moods, I could write 10,000 of these....In other moods, I have no faults whatsoever, except that maybe I have a truly bipolar ego.

Mr. Average · Post by **Mr. Average** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 12:15 pm

Bobster:
I have had the pleasure of meeting you and enjoying a common interest...Elvis Costello and the Imposters in concert. You are as likeable in person as the persona that represents you on this forum. Anytime you can spend two hours speaking with someone and it seems like only 15 minutes has passed, you appreciate that persons ability to be interesting and a compelling speaker.

The scary thing is that there are many people who really would find it difficult to list their faults. These folks live in ignorant bliss that they are okay and the rest of us are all bozo's on this bus. Hell, I've reserved seat 1A on the bozo bus and I am damn proud of it. I see a therapist (sorry Tom, but it has made a huge difference in my life), and most important, I find it easier and easier to laugh at my many faults.

I spend a significant part of each day laughing. I have lot's of material.

noiseradio · Post by **noiseradio** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 1:43 pm

Mr. Misery wrote:If someone had quoted the passage and said bravo you would have no problem with that. But since I found it an ugly thing to say suddenly it's his business and no one must say boo to a Spooky. He posted it on a public forum and I have a right to react.

I don't expect anyone will support me.

Don't tell me what I would have thought if someone had applauded his post. You don't know me any more that you know Dr. Spooky.

Actually, I think it's incredibly ignorant of you to make assumptions about the man's life. You may think it's ugly, and certainly you can say so. But you assume things about their relationship that you can't possibly know. Maybe she was a horrible, abusive person. Maybe he'slucky to have gotten out of the relationship alive. Or maybe they just grew apart and got divorced. Point is, he may have excellent reason to post that the divorce was better for him. And unless you know the situation, which you clearly do not, it's stupid to shake your finger at him.

My sister got divorced, after having two kids. Her ex cheated on her like a dog. He was emotionally abusive to her and the kids. She ended up losing about 40 pounds because of the stress of it all. While not a diet she would recommend, it was the one positive thing in a situation that sucked. Dr. Spooky's post could easily have been made by her (with less poundage). And your response would have been entirely inappropriate, as she was a complete victim in the situation. Since you don't know the details of Dr. Spooky's divorce, you should refrain completely from being such an arrogant judge of his character.

Otis Westinghouse · Post by **Otis Westinghouse** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 2:03 pm

verbal gymnastics wrote:
Otis Westinghouse wrote:I still love you, Jackson, and when we next get together, let's work on no. 8 a little, OK?
Am I misinterpreting this or does Otis want Jackson to flirt with him shamelessly? It's the "no men as yet, but give it time" bit that's confusing me

That's the essence of it. I was trying to raise his self-esteem.

pophead2k · Post by **pophead2k** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 2:16 pm

1. Am a moral relativist and prone to self-righteous bouts of hypocrisy.
2. Have allowed my standards of quality beer to slide horribly.
3. Haven't written a song in 9 months.
4. Gossip too often.
5. Too often take pleasure in the minor misfortunes of others.
6. Have claimed to have read books and seen films that I have, in fact, not.
7. Voted Republican once in 1988.

bobster · Post by **bobster** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 2:24 pm

Thanks Mr. A, but you know, while I've certainly got my faults I don't relish reading a list of them! Especially prepared by someone else. "Constructive criticism" is the moral equivalent of, say, a visit to the proctologist. Neccessary on occasion but sersiously unpleasant and you've just got to pray that the proctologist is, er, well intentioned.

Mr. Average · Post by **Mr. Average** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 2:29 pm

Bobster:

My post was all complimentary. And note: I have not succumbed to listing my faults, because the resultant server overload and fire could damage the home of two of our most revered posters.

Jackson Monk · Post by **Jackson Monk** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 3:21 pm

verbal gymnastics wrote:
Otis Westinghouse wrote:I still love you, Jackson, and when we next get together, let's work on no. 8 a little, OK?
Am I misinterpreting this or does Otis want Jackson to flirt with him shamelessly? It's the "no men as yet, but give it time" bit that's confusing me

Gilli - I've got a terrible memory and I'll tell you another thing; I've got a terrible memory

We are both in touch with our femine sides......we just avoid touching each other's masculine sides....

Jackson Monk · Post by **Jackson Monk** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 3:25 pm

...ummmm actually that sounds worse!

bobster · Post by **bobster** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 3:45 pm

Jackson,

Once you start down this rhetorical road, there's no way out. My sympathies, brother!

El Vez · Post by **El Vez** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 4:23 pm

Thow another log on the fire, boys....

1. I don't stand up to my boss who is an abrasive boor. I get so uncomforable around him that I sometimes find myself unable to even effectively articulate a point or grievance.
2. I too enjoy gossip far more than I should.
3. I rented Diary of A Mad Black Woman to be ironic.
4. I owned a copy of The Tree of Wooden Clogs for over six years and never watched it.
5. I was once a metalhead.

selfmademug · Post by **selfmademug** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 5:23 pm

Oh, I just don't know where to begin...

Mr. Misery · Post by **Mr. Misery** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 6:43 pm

noiseradio wrote:My sister got divorced, after having two kids. Her ex cheated on her like a dog. He was emotionally abusive to her and the kids. She ended up losing about 40 pounds because of the stress of it all. While not a diet she would recommend, it was the one positive thing in a situation that sucked. Dr. Spooky's post could easily have been made by her (with less poundage).

Just to clear up one thing, because I think you don't understand the joke he made and why I found it loathesome. He wasn't saying that after his divorce he lost weight and became healthier. He was saying (and actually it's an old joke) that his ex-wife was "180 pounds of ugly fat" that he got rid of when they divorced. In my ignorance and stupidity I took exception to that cruel and gratuitous remark.

bobster · Post by **bobster** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 6:47 pm

El Vez wrote:4. I owned a copy of The Tree of Wooden Clogs for over six years and never watched it.

I helped a friend of mine with some new subtitles that were being prepared for some new version of that movie a while back. Personally, I don't think you should be so ashamed -- this is one of those movies were you spend as much time looking at horses and farm equipment as people. Of course, I'm famed for my mild allergy to Italian neorealism!

selfmademug · Post by **selfmademug** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 6:49 pm

bobster wrote:
El Vez wrote:Of course, I'm famed for my mild allergy to Italian neorealism!

Yes, only yesterday I read something about you along these lines in one of the Trades...

noiseradio · Post by **noiseradio** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 6:57 pm

Mr. Misery wrote:
noiseradio wrote:My sister got divorced, after having two kids. Her ex cheated on her like a dog. He was emotionally abusive to her and the kids. She ended up losing about 40 pounds because of the stress of it all. While not a diet she would recommend, it was the one positive thing in a situation that sucked. Dr. Spooky's post could easily have been made by her (with less poundage).
Just to clear up one thing, because I think you don't understand the joke he made and why I found it loathesome. He wasn't saying that after his divorce he lost weight and became healthier. He was saying (and actually it's an old joke) that his ex-wife was "180 pounds of ugly fat" that he got rid of when they divorced. In my ignorance and stupidity I took exception to that cruel and gratuitous remark.

And once again, you don't know her. She might have been a horrid person. Humor might be the only way he knows how to deal with it. The point remains that you don't know a thing about the situation.

Post by **DrSpooky** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 9:56 pm

Thanks, Noise. You know, she was hurtful. But the comment was just a joke. Laugh a little and you won't be so miserable.

"And if I laugh at any mortal thing, 'tis that I may not weep."

--Lord Byron

ice nine · Post by **ice nine** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 11:27 pm

How does this thread reflect upon on Mr. MacManus?

IDEA: We all kill ourselves and in the suicide notes we mention this site. I can imagine the news broadcasts. 'All members of The Elvis Costello Fans dot com found dead.'

noiseradio · Post by **noiseradio** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 11:38 pm

Dr. Spooky,

Nice Byron quote. Sorry to poke my nose into your business. I just think some people are incredibly assuming about what they can say about other people's lives, especially where divorce is concerned. People can be real pricks, you know? Monstrous pricks. Monstrous pricks that should learn to kiss up more.

Or maybe they already know how.

ice nine wrote:How does this thread reflect upon on Mr. MacManus?

It doesn't. Which is why it's in the Annex. But Elvis is pretty down on himself sometimes. I think he'd approve.

Jackson Monk · Post by **Jackson Monk** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 1:34 am

Mr. Misery wrote:
noiseradio wrote:My sister got divorced, after having two kids. Her ex cheated on her like a dog. He was emotionally abusive to her and the kids. She ended up losing about 40 pounds because of the stress of it all. While not a diet she would recommend, it was the one positive thing in a situation that sucked. Dr. Spooky's post could easily have been made by her (with less poundage).
Just to clear up one thing, because I think you don't understand the joke he made and why I found it loathesome. He wasn't saying that after his divorce he lost weight and became healthier. He was saying (and actually it's an old joke) that his ex-wife was "180 pounds of ugly fat" that he got rid of when they divorced. In my ignorance and stupidity I took exception to that cruel and gratuitous remark.

I got it!!

pip_52 · Post by **pip_52** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 7:18 am

We wont have to kill ourselves now though, because Jackson has given us all the opportunity to express our myriad insecurities in a loving and nurturing environment. Its like therapy for the techno-voyeur generation!

Gillibeanz · Post by **Gillibeanz** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 7:20 am

shatterproof wrote:Among others....
1. I am a terrible passenger and subsequently, terrible company, on road trips. There's something about the passenger side that makes me fall asleep almost instantly.
2. I have no willpower. And despite this fact, I decided to order a case of potato chips thinking they'd last all summer. I finished them in less than 2 weeks, averaging about a bag a day. But let me just say that Herr's Ketchup Chips are damn good and I can't allow them in my house ever again.
3. I will watch 3 consecutive episodes of Law and Order and then complain that I don't have any time to read for pleasure. So yeah, I'm lazy.

I cant believe you missed out the fact that you actually like Hob Nobs on your list of faults SP!!!